Glowsquid
From Userpedia
“I may be 99% jerk.
But your 100% stupid jerk :|”
—Uniju, making a very accurate assessment
“Blitzwind is officially the MarioWikian version of the Nostalgia Critic.”
—Crypt Raider
Glowsquid (previously known as Gofer, Glowsquid then Blitzwing) is guy who did things.
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TRUE History
Glowsquid was an immortal super soldier in the space nebula, he killed his creator because that's what all cool artificial monsters do! Glowsquid had special power, he could control fire and wind! Many creatures were jealous of that so they didn't like him and made him sad. He killed those too!
Later, he joined a powerful place know as the Mario wiki and did things like creating his own kingdom. However, Lord Protectorate Unidus despised his abusive crossing of the border and declared war! It was futile, because Glowsquid was invincible...
Or so he thought. A special Shift commando force ambushed him and threw him into a fusion reactor. The ensuing cerebral damages left him as little more than an incoherent, babbling wreck.
Imaginary Nonsense
Glowsquid joined the MarioWiki forum under the name Gofer after someone made an insulting post in French. Because everyone needs to know what "Osti de Tabarnak" means.
Glowsquid later registered on the actual wiki. His most notable action was to oppose the nomination of 3Dejong as a sysop, which caused him to be harassed by Max2 and Fg.
Glowsquid then registered on Userpedia, where he proceeded to improve with brilliants concept such as the "Gopherian Empire" and a story with thrilling plot points like users going to Wikipedia and beating up the Angry Video Game nerd, a story which THANKFULLY NEVER HAPPENED.
Later, in his user life, Gofer changed his name to "Glowsquid" because oh my god, did that name sucks.
After that, Glowsquid registered on the Scribblewiki incarnation of Userpedia and promptly popularized the concept of making "funny" articles "styled" on the Transformers wiki, after he rewrote his article with brilliant lines like "[Opposing 3Dejong's sysop nomination] was the Mariowiki equivalent of going to a church on sunday and screaming that god sucks".
Hah-ah-ha
Other then that, he trashtalked a few users he didn't like and complained about everything.
Then, Glowsquid changed his name to "Blitzwing" because of an hormone-fueled Transformers craze. After Glowsquid made an ironic comment asking to be promoted, RAP promoted him to Patroller. After that, the patroller ranking was phased out and Glowsquid was promoted to Sysop.
Sometimes after, Glowsquid participated in the "Director Election" of The 'Shroom. He won, but his pathetic handling of the newspaper nearly caused it to be removed of the wiki.
Glowsquid later requested to have his sysop powers removed. He can still sometimes be found trash-talking users behind their back.
After a few months, he changed his name back to "Glowsquid".
Personality
As Gofer, he was an idiot.
As Glowsquid, he was still an idiot.
As Blitzwing, he's still an idiot with the POWER OF SPELL CHECK. He likes harassing other users (in a familly friendly way, of course), quoting tepid meme and acting on instinct. He truly is a child of the internet generation.
Power and abilities
Glowsquid can convert oxygen into a source of energy, he is able to use his muscles to produce sound, and coordinate his limbs to create movements.
The Tally of Egocentrism
Blitzwing is cool, though he'll probably get mad at me for not saying something bad about him. - Plumber
Oh lord, he is extremely annoying to argue with; He constantly distorts and takes out of context virtually everything you say to prove a flawed point of his. But his cruel sarcasm and hilarious tongue-in-cheek self-bashing more than makes up for this. --Black Hole Sun(T|C|E) 13:31, 6 June 2009 (UTC)
He's cool. And always puts me in place when I try to speak French. - Smiddle
An active and helpful user, but he does get pretty ticked off whenever you're late with your 'Shroom section. - Glitchman
Lol he almost helped me with my french homework, but I got it done before he could translate (Yea, in Canada you HAVE to learn French) But still that was proving what a great friend you are =3 - Super-Yoshi
...Per all. - MegaMario
An awesome Sysop, a great 'Shroom director, and a cool dude. - Stooby
Pretty dang cool. -IS
......you guys just can't forgive any mistakes do you.Crypt,Blitz, you suck right now.I wish I could just revert you guys to Minimariolover10 and Glowsquid. - Koopa-Paratroopa
Epic. Blitzwing tells you exactly what he thinks of you, so when he says something you know he means it and that's that. - Steuben von Scarecrow
hes too ftw for all of you, AGGRESIVELY uper-Yoshi
I scarred you!! *evil pleasure* Anyways, he's cool enough.- Tabuuownsall132x2
Pandas are too f'n dumb to breed. Oh yeah, Glowsquid is freaking hilarious. - Henrydamoose
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Patrollers of the Super Mario Wiki
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Sysops of the Super Mario Wiki
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Moderators of the Super Mario Wiki Forums
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Moderators of the Userpedia Forums
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| Director of The 'Shroom |
| HK-47 · Wayoshi · Sadaharu · Plumber · Blitzwing · Stooben Rooben · Tucayo · Stooben Rooben · Tucayo · Stooben Rooben |
| Sub-director of The 'Shroom |
| Garlic Man · Tucayo · Stooben Rooben · Tucayo · Stooben Rooben · Tucayo |
| Editor-in-Chief of The 'Shroom |
| HK-47 · Plumber · Xzelion · Beanbean · Yoshario · Ralphfan · Twentytwofiftyseven |
| Director of the Fake News Team |
| WarioLoaf · Confused · Xzelion · Stooben Rooben · 3Dejong · Stooben Rooben · Glitchman · Xpike · Ralphfan |
| Director of the Fun Stuff Team |
| Z3r0 Tw0 |
| Director of the Music & Artwork Team |
| Super Mario Bros. · YellowYoshi127 · P. Trainer |
| Director of the Pipe Plaza |
| Super Mario Bros. · Marioguy1 |
